listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
