this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
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