Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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