New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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