Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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