If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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