Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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