I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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