One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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