I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
