in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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