And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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