I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
How does one acquire holy water?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
