Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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