Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
