Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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