he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
