I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
it's great music for shaving your balls
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
