So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
