i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
