There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Randomize
