I'm going to jail i love you
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
