He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
