Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
