I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
