You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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