HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
