just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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