doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
