Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry HELLODAKODA hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(314): View more from Missouri

Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.

Fav 8 1683 835
share tweet
(206): View more from Washington

i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.

Fav 3 3287 759
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(419): View more from Ohio

Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?

(216): View more from Ohio

Turn them off?

Fav 20 4384 920
share tweet
(440): View more from Ohio

that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...

Fav 12 995 4434
share tweet
(952): View more from Minnesota

I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga

Fav 29 13800 1450
share tweet
(713): View more from Texas

He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.

Fav 23 7587 1339
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(850): View more from Florida

By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever

Fav 56 12916 1426
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(956): View more from Texas

I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.

Fav 2 877 739
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...

Fav 0 57 3
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT