Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
