Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
