I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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