it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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