i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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