You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
send nudes
from the living room?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
