So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize