I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
40s are totally the cure
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
