We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I licked your asshole in confidence.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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