Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
