stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
