And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
