like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
