I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
