Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
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