I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
