he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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