i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize