where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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