can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
