I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
