Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
